6 hands rose from a sea of 30 odd people.
Explainable given the nature of the event.

But I didn’t raise my hand.

As the talk went on, on why we could possibly not feel any attachment to Singapore (‘A great divide’), i realized i don’t hate Singapore as known. But neither do I dislike her.

In fact, I love her like i love my sister. I dislike you, i will be angry at you and your actions. I’m not terribly fond of you. In fact i’m always against you. But I’ll still do things for you. Yet, you (Singapore and my sister) will ignore me in spite of what i will and am willing to do for you. I will scold you, criticize you, mock you and spurn you. But I will not let anyone do it, only I can speak bad of you. Yet should anything go wrong, at the end of the day, I will still return to help you.

Such is the extent of my loyalty and love for a country that has been my home for my life.

So Happy Birthday Singapore. You can ‘count on me’.

P.s. i still refuse to recite the pledge at 8.22 tonight.

The tiramisu is an all time favourite in my place. Made often at midnight to full-fill a craving or for company that will be arriving suddenly the next day. Eaten for breakfast, lunch, tea and dinner, the tiramisu is never unwanted in my house. It Barely survives a day in the fridge and anyone wanting extras, has to snatch for it.

However… I confess, I make it with instant coffee powder, whipping cream and whatever liqueur that catches my fancy. Usually a combination of rum and frangelico.

It makes me wonder whether it really can be called as an tiramisu, for  it contains no marsala and there isn’t a need to make a zabaglione. And it only takes 10 minutes to put together. Horrors, purists would faint and refuse to eat my heretic version of a tiramisu. But unfortunately, or fortunately, that’s where the charm of my tiramisu lies. Its easy to prepare at any day of the day, no matter how old you are.

Now excuse me while i eat my tiramisu at 2am in the morning and hope to fall asleep later.

But i can’t eat crusty bread. I can’t eat crust fragant chewy bread. All i can eat is gardenia bread. (Don’t get me started on soft chewy gummy white tasteless sticky mush that passes of as bread that keeps for donkey’s years. I actually like my bread to deteriorate in condition within a few days. )

All because my wisdom tooth (the third one!*) has decided it would be a good time to grow, leaving me with swollen gums on the lower right side of my face. (PAIN.)

And i refuse to compromise on my ethics and eat gardenia. I did rather starve.  So while wallowing in pain, i started playing around with words. Pain in the a**. Pain in the neck. Painkiller. Painstaking. Pain Perdu. Bingo.

The first time i read of Pain perdu, was when i first began learning how to cook. My mom dumped me at the library expecting me to borrow something simple, easy and well local. And i had to bring home Crave.  Crave was a different world altogether from what i knew. I read for the first time in my life words like souffle and saute and, of course, pain perdu.

At that point, i had no idea i was simply making a custard to dip bread into. It was exotic, thrilling and captivating. I recall slowly turning the bread (yes, it was gardenia and not a broiche) over in the pan, slowly counting the seconds to a minute.

But now at midnight, it really is the simplest solution to my hunger. And possibly one of the most delicious.

I present to you my take on pain perdu for those in pain^.

Pain Perdu with yogurt strawberry cream.

Pain perdu.
- stale bread, sliced not too thinly nor not too thickly, approximately the width of my 2nd finger.
- 2 egg yolks + 1 egg
- 1/2 cup of milk (You could also use half and half. Which i prefer. Or half full cream milk and half single cream.)
- pinch of salt
- 2 1/2 tbsp vanilla sugar (or you could use caster sugar and add a dash of vanilla extract or use vanilla beans if you have lots to spare)
- butter

1. In a bowl, mix egg, sugar and salt together. Add in the milk after all the sugar is dissolved. Pour  mixture into a shallow dish.
2. Place bread in the dish to soak, while bread is soaking, prepare the pan.
3.  Heat up a frying pan over low heat. Melt the butter.
4. While butter is melting, flip the bread over in the dish. By now the bread should have soaked up the custard and should be firm and heavy but not about to disintegrate or break.
5. Slowly place bread in pan. Cook over a low-medium flame until both sides are golden. Warning : it is only a matter of seconds it turns from golden to too brown.
6. Cool on a cake rack, while you prepare the yogurt cream. Or if hunger has overcame you by this point, simply put it in mouth and eat.

Yogurt Strawberry Cream

Really this cream is a cheat. By rights i should be telling you to saute or, better yet, flambe some strawberries in cointreau and maybe than pureeing them and folding them into whipped cream or a creme chantilly or a lightened pastry cream. But I have no strawberries nor am i about to rush off to my closest 24 hour supermarket in my pjs and face mask.

- 2 tbsp of yogurt.
- 1 1/2 tbsp of cream, whipping or double.
- 1 1/2 tbsp of strawberry jam. (Could be more, could be less, up to you.)
- 2 tsp vanilla sugar (Feel free to increase or decrease the amount, depanding on how sweet is your jam or how sour is your yogurt or how developed or underdeveloped your sweet tooth is.)

1. Mix yogurt and cream and sugar together.
2. Fold in jam.
3. Serve with the toast. Or eat in with cereals or health bars or with your fingers.

Serve toast with cream. Eat in joy.

Until you realize, the pain has not subsided, the swelling is getting worst and maybe its time to see the dentist.

*the 2nd wisdom tooth, decided to sprout in the middle of a plane flight from Seoul to Singapore after a family holiday. I think due to the different air pressure or something, it actually hurt worse. Bright side, it could have decided to grow from Singapore to Seoul.

^Obviously wisdom teeth, do not come with the ability to be witty.

House, Gregory House

I just realized that my old, school house t-shirt, says ‘Gregory House’ at the back.

For those not in the know, Gregory House is the protaganist of one of my favourite tv shows, ‘House’. (Well, Duh.) Cool eh? I’ve been advertising House for the longest of times!

Wow, you know what this means? I don’t have to spend money to buy a ‘House’ t-shirt. I have one!

A movie is a one night stand. Whereas, a TV series is a long term relationship. 

When you watch a tv series (eg. House, Gossip Girl, Secret Diary), you commit yourself. You invest yourself emotionally into the show. You find yourself drawn into the plot, the characters which you like or dislike. You know what you like about it, what you detest and the allure about it. 

A movie on the other hand is an decision. You choose to watch that movie, you put up with it for that time span. And when you’re done you leave. Not unlike a one night stand where you chose your victim/prey/object/interest, and whether your choice sucks or not… you’re stuck with it until the time is up.

On the bright side, I don’t think you’ll be the only one losing a million dollars. So don’t kill yourself over this.

Many of my friends keep asking me for a recipe for a Carbonara. And each and every time… i’m reluctant to give them the recipe. The responds would be this is Carbonara? I want the authentic one! The creamy one! And i go.. this is the authentic version in a deadly quiet tone. 

I could have given them the version with cream.. but i want them to know how much food here in Singapore (and else where), is bastardized to suit our own tastes, conveniences and prejudices (GOSH SEMI COOKED EGGS!) and (i don’t intend any harm, but i’m a food purist) religious needs. 

I’ll spare you the rant.

 But as one of my best friends, who i own my life many times over, asked, i have no choice but to source the best solution for her. 

And here it is, adapted from Michel Richards’ ‘Happy in the Kitchen’, the best of both worlds:

Carbonara sauce

Ingredients

•  113gm sliced bacon
• 1/2 cup heavy cream
• 1 Large egg yolk
• sea salt and black pepper
• 2 tbsp Parmesan cheese, plus extra for sprinkling
• cooked pasta (about 2 portions). 

Directions

• Cut the bacon into (0.3175cm) strips. Place in a non-stick pan and sauté over medium-high heat, stirring oven, until the bacon is crisp and browned. (Careful, crisp and brown is not far from brown and burnt.) 
• Meanwhile, mix together ¼ cup of the cream and egg yolk and set aside.
• Transfer the bacon to paper towels to drain. Pour the fat out of the pan and wipe the pan clean with a paper towel. 
• Return the pan to the burner, add the butter and melt over medium heat. Add the bacon and the remaining ¼ cup of cream and simmer for 30 seconds. Add your pasta (al dente please) and ½ tsp each of salt and pepper. Toss for a while to warm the noodles. 
• Remove pan from heat and stir in the reserved cream-egg mixture and the Parmesan. 
• Taste and season if needed. Serve immediately (Heed this please, it coagulates fast). 

I would drink it. But she? Whats a nice, non-alcoholic girl, like her to do?

Here’s a list of suggestions to help her. 

1. Rumballs (duh) 
2. Tiramisu, the untraditional way.
3. Rum and raisins. 
   Make a batch of rum and raisins and dump it on some good vanilla icecream. Beats any commercial byproduct with all the rum essence and natural identical flavouring any day. 
4. Banana Cake
5. Fruit Cake
   Replace the brandy with rum. And it will keep next to forever. 
6. Chocolate Truffles 
7. Cuba Libre
   Have a party. You can make 14 glasses of cuba libre with 700ml of rum. You just need 1.68 L of coke. And some limes.

So my nice dear non-alcoholic girl, here’s my 2 cents. Feel free to find me for more elaboration. Till than, toodles!

I have a sister, she’s whiny, she’s demanding, she’s a brat. But i still love her, and these rum balls, are my labour of love for her. 

Thank goodness she likes my version, the proof being the dozen she scoffed down in ten minutes. Its a good thing they are real easy to make. 

Rum balls in Singapore, are what the older generation (namely my grandparents) eat and used to eat. It isn’t exactly a modern food item nor… a common popular item you can buy at your nearish neighbourhood cake shop. (At the holland village area, at least) The only place i know that sell rum balls are at the Balmoral Bakery at Sunset. Those rum balls .. are dense cakey balls, lacking a little in the chocolate department, with (i’m sure) no rum to their name at all. But those balls, are the gold standard, my family – namely my sister, judges all rum balls by. ( I hear Mr X screaming. ) 

Well, so the story goes like this, my sister while skyping decides one day that she has to have rum balls. I the nicer, older sister, obligingly agree. And now i’m saddled with the task of making rum balls. Countless google searches later, i’m stuck with a ton of recipes that use nuts, corn syrup, desiccated coconut and jam. All iingredients my sister (and i) would balk at. 

But i lucked out. And found a recipe similar to my needs to guide me. And here is my edited version. (And plus i think this is wayy better than the ‘balmoral’ edition, dense, less cakey, moist with a good chocolate flavour and a tinge of rum to finish. I like the improvement.)

• 200 gm dark chocolate, 70% 
• 1/4 cup cream 
• 30 gm butter
• A pinch of salt
• 200 gm chocolate cake crumbs (you could use a plain cake, i confess to Sara Lee’s Chocolate Pound cake. In my defense, my oven is spoilt.)
• 2 1/2 tbsp dark rum (adjust the quantity as you see fit.) 
• Cocoa powder

•  Chop the chocolate and place it in a heatproof bowl.
• Combine the cream and butter together in a small saucepan. Stir till the butter melts and bring it to a simmer.
• Pour the cream over the chocolate and stir till the chocolate melts and the mixture is smooth and shiny. 
• Add the pinch of salt and half of the rum into the chocolate mixture (better known as a ganache). 
• Sprinkle the remaining rum over the cake crumbs. 
• Stir the crumbs into the ganache and chill the mixture for half an hour or until firm. 
• After which, roll heaped teaspoons full of the mixture into balls. 
• The ‘traditional’ way would be to coat the ball with chocolate sprinkles and than chill and than eat. But i prefer cocoa powder, this way … it resembles a chocolate truffle until you bite into it. 
• Chill and eat at leisure. Preferably with milk. 

1.  How to get cake crumbs: Use a fork to flake the cake into crumbs.
2. About the Rum: If you want a stronger rum flavour, sprinkle the rum into the cake crumbs and/or up it. If you don’t want such a strong rum profile, do it my way – half and half. And if you’re scared, just reduce.